Day 16: "Difficult" People

I don't know these people, but I like them.

Remember how I lamented the difficulty of choosing gifts for certain men in my family on Day 8? Well, I dealt with one of these gentlemen today, and I would like to offer a few words of support to anyone else who struggles with what to do for those sorts of people. You know, the ones who either already have everything or who never seem happy with any gifts.

• You do not have to make a person's dreams come true with your Christmas gift.
• If you have someone in your life who literally never seems thrilled with any gift whatsoever, it may simply be a case of that person enjoying the act of giving more than receiving. Or perhaps he is uncomfortable receiving gifts for some personal reason that you don't understand. Accept it and move on.
• If you feel that you absolutely must give a Christmas gift to a person who is hard to shop for, do the best you can to ascertain the sorts of things he or she likes, get the gift, and don't expect a big "wow" when it is opened. It's okay.
• Ask someone close to the recipient for tips. I did that and learned that my difficult person (you know what I mean) likes clothes. He doesn't flip out over clothes, but he does like clothes, so I found out his size and went shopping online at his favorite store...from which I had a discount coupon!
• If your difficult person is your parent, he might not like it when you spend your hard-earned money on him. Ever see that episode of Seinfeld in which Jerry tries so hard to give his dad a new wallet with money hidden inside? What did Mr. Seinfeld do when Jerry wasn't looking? He tossed the wallet in the trash without ever looking inside because it closed with Velcro, and his dad hated Velcro! Parents are parents, and it's not our job to make them decide to enjoy receiving gifts. Just don't hide money inside your present!
• Think of some little things that please your recipient. Mine gets a kick out lottery tickets and tiny bottles of booze. I'm way too uppity to ever purchase a lottery ticket or enter an ABC store, so I make my husband take care of this.  :)
• It might be nice to give a donation to the person's favorite charity for Christmas. 
• Does the person love anybody? Sure he does! How about giving him pictures of the people or pets he loves? You could put them in frames, on magnets, in books, or in a new wallet!
• Gift certificates are generally appreciated.
• Bottom line: Put a little thought into it, but don't make yourself crazy trying to please. It's wasted energy and doesn't improve your gift's impact. 
• Give a gift with love in your heart and don't worry about the recipient's reaction.

Here is what my calendar and master list look like as of this afternoon:

Report on the Handmade Gift

I do hereby promise that I will spend 60 minutes on my big handmade Christmas project as soon as I finish this blog entry. If Day 17 doesn't provide evidence of this effort, I will punish myself with no Starbucks that day. So there.

Clothes for a Child In Need

Before I write this paragraph, let me say that I don't discuss my charitable giving here in order to praise myself or to elicit commendations. I'm blogging about it to include the concept of giving outside of one's own circle of friends in the challenge I have undertaken this month. It is in that spirit that I share my plans to buy clothes for a child in need next month. I can't do it during Christmas in August, because the child's wish list will not be available until September. The best I can do now is to set aside funds and let the group I plan to work with, The Needlework Guild, know I am interested in participating in their annual new clothing drive. Members of NGA collect information about what is needed and wanted among children at our local elementary and middle schools and assign each child to a participating donor (or personal shopper as I like to think of it). Our chapter president promised me a middle school girl this year, and as the mother of boys, I can tell you that I am happy whenever I get to shop for girly things! 

TALLY:

13 Family & Friends: CHECK

10 Neighbors: CHECK

45 Piano Students: CHECK

Charitable Gifts:  4 DOWN (1 more in September)

Stockings: GOOD!

Handmade Project: Working on it now.